It's a crazy day. I shall not blog too much about it right now because there's too much going through my head now and I need to have dinner (porridge) with my mum in a short while.
You're also so busy at work and your working hours have changed too. I know you're working hard and it's not easy to balance work, studying, trying to make sales and having unfinished assignments at the back of your mind...all a the same time!
Everytime you message to tell me about the sales for the day, I just feel like giving you a big hug. I know you're working hard and it's really not easy. I believe in you and I know things will get better, ok? I get affected by how you feel at work too...when you're happy, I'm so happy. When you're dejected and demoralised, I feel it too and I wish I could help but I know nuts about sales and I'm not so sure if I'm in the right position to offer any advice....
I'll help make things easier by not being a parasitic girlfriend, ok? I do understand that we can't spend as much time as we would like to together. It's ok. 2 months or whatever, I do understand ok? I want you to know that I do not want to become one of your worries.... I mean...of course I want you to be concerned about our relationship and worry lah...but not as in you worry about me till it adds to your stress ok?
You asked me to bear with you....I also need you to bear with me...cos I'm also busy at work...this anniversary dinner that I'm in charge of is no joke and I'm going to be so pressed by it. The pressure is building up and the time is getting lesser. I almost snapped at a few colleagues today just because I was stressed and grumpy. 3rd June...my release...
I also have a dinner this Saturday night. It's some People's Association dinner at Suntec City Convention Hall and I think it will end at about 10:30 or so...have to go but its not by choice. The arrow shot over and got me....perhaps we could meet up after that for drinks, movie or coffee after that dinner? Provided you have energy after your dragon boat training in the noon, of course...
Speaking of dragon boat training....I'm so happy for you....and for me too... cos I get to touch and admire those biceps that I absolutely, bimbotically adore....*Oooo*....hehe
I love you...and we'll stick through this together, ok?
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Monday, May 22, 2006
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Feeding
We brought the kids to Farm Mart and Qian Hu today. It was fun telling them about the animals and showing them around.
I bought a dollar's worth of vegetables for them to feed the 3 mountain goats at Farm Mart. Rachel got kindafrightened disinterested after a while and requested to feed the rabbits instead. So I bought a little bag of baby corn and carrots for her to feed them. There were guinea pigs too! We had fun.
I must say....I think these poor animals deserve better. They live in stinky cages that are poorly maintained. It was sad to see how much they clamoured for the food and how far they would stick their noses through the cage to get to the food.
We discovered that Julian likes fish! He was totally fascinated by the fishes and would spend time ooh-ing and ah-ing at each fish tank.
We stopped for ice-cream and crackers at Qian Hu before heading back home.
Then I met M at West Mall to discuss camp stuff.
Then I met him at West Mall for dinner.
Ok. Got to go shower. Lots of stuff to do tonight.
Killer Week, Here I Come!!
I bought a dollar's worth of vegetables for them to feed the 3 mountain goats at Farm Mart. Rachel got kinda
I must say....I think these poor animals deserve better. They live in stinky cages that are poorly maintained. It was sad to see how much they clamoured for the food and how far they would stick their noses through the cage to get to the food.
We discovered that Julian likes fish! He was totally fascinated by the fishes and would spend time ooh-ing and ah-ing at each fish tank.
We stopped for ice-cream and crackers at Qian Hu before heading back home.
Then I met M at West Mall to discuss camp stuff.
Then I met him at West Mall for dinner.
Ok. Got to go shower. Lots of stuff to do tonight.
Killer Week, Here I Come!!
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Cousins
Cousins
This picture was taken on 29 Dec 2002 at grandma's house. Han had bought dinner for everyone and it was cos he was going to be away (again) for a long time. We had driven out to many different places to get dinner. We bought curry, chicken rice, golden pillow, etc. There was also wine!
Then I insisted we gathered for a cousins-photo. Afterall, it was really rare to get all 8 of us around. The 8 have expanded to include Eddie and Jimmy...and also the 2 babies Rachel and Julian.
The 8 of us grew up together. Our favourite play places would have to be great-grandma's old house at St Gregory's road (behind City Hall) and the bungalow at Pasir Ris that my aunt would rent every holiday without fail.
We would be the first kids at Pasir Ris Park in the morning. We made it a point to wake up early so we could hit the playground early. Be the first to be on the slide, cut through the maze, get on the flying fox... I close my eyes now and I can still feel the park in the morning..the cool morning air, the occasional sqwuak of birds... and we'd run down the slope all the way to the playground.
We explored every bit of Pasir Ris park. Bicycle rental was a luxury that we did not always have. The rental kiosk was all the way over at the other end of the park. We'd walk through the whole park just to get our bikes. Then we'd cycle up and down the whole park, making stopovers back at the bungalow for drinks.
Once, we went on a coconut harvest spree. We searched for coconut trees that were short enough for us to reach the fruit. We plucked the fruit and smashed it against some rocks. Then the coconut juice would flow out like a tap and we'd take turns to drink. Then we threw the husks into the sea. It was PURE FUN.
We took photos too. There are a set of photos of the 8 of us playing at the park.
You're such a big part of my childhood. You're a bigger part of my growing years...how did we end up being the closest? I'm not sure...but somehow, you and I understood each other the best. I was able to show you my darker side and you never judged me. You shared bgr stuff with me and even asked me for my opinions on the gals you dated. I never judged you too. We even went clubbing at SOS together, remember?
Gosh....I miss you.
Liquid Chocolate
"Don't bother coming. They're closing at 12:15"
I call her up immediately.
"Isn't there CDAC tuition today? Why 12:15? Are you sure?"
"Ok hang on, I'll find out."
Ten minutes later she calls back and tells me its confirmed. I rush through my coffee and head to school.
I pack up the mess on my table. Throw away old and outdated stuff and delivered some items to other colleagues. I'm ready. It only took me 20 minutes.
I just had to make sure things were clear for the upcoming week.
Term 2 Week 10. Here I come!
Oh...by the way, I've got my hair highlighted. I asked for chocolate colour. It's not so obvious, which is good because I don't want to handle any snide remarks or questions at work.
Chocolate coloured hair. Yum!
I call her up immediately.
"Isn't there CDAC tuition today? Why 12:15? Are you sure?"
"Ok hang on, I'll find out."
Ten minutes later she calls back and tells me its confirmed. I rush through my coffee and head to school.
I pack up the mess on my table. Throw away old and outdated stuff and delivered some items to other colleagues. I'm ready. It only took me 20 minutes.
I just had to make sure things were clear for the upcoming week.
Term 2 Week 10. Here I come!
Oh...by the way, I've got my hair highlighted. I asked for chocolate colour. It's not so obvious, which is good because I don't want to handle any snide remarks or questions at work.
Chocolate coloured hair. Yum!
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Of friendships made and pleasures shared, and lessons learnt apace.
Karen got married today.
It was like a mini MG-reunion at her wedding! I met old friends Sharon, Lulu, Meifang, Belinda and Juli. we were all from different classes. Belinda, Sharon, Meifang, Juli and Karen were from Arts1. Lulu was from Arts2 and I was from Science2. Despite that, we all recognized each other and the moment we met, we were like "Oh my God, (name)!!!!" Lulu and I wre trying the recall the last time we saw each other. We both realised (to our disbelief) that its been Fifteen years!! Wow....we haven changed abit. :-)
And even Mrs Moses Yu attended the wedding! We were so happy to see Mrs Yu. Mrs Yu never taught me at MG but somehow, the community was so small back then and everyone knew everyone, ever girl knew every teacher too. Mrs Yu was the form teacher of Arts1. She taught my sister and I think she even taught my mum! She's still bright and cheery. Over lunch, you can see all of us girls fussing over her, helping her get her food, eating with her, chatting and etc. No we were not boot-licking or whatever....Mrs Yu has luekemia and she walks with a stick really slowly. So were were just doing what we've been taught at school.
To master, to grow and to serve. (MGS Motto)
It was really fun meeting up with old friends. We may not have been really close back then, but somehow the connection is still there when we sit and talk about the good ol' days.
Lulu can speak fluent Japanese! She's working in Tokyo now and she has been out of Singapore for the past 11 years. She first went to the States to study after her A levels at Nanyang JC. Then she worked in LA and in San Francisco. Then she quit her job and went to Japan to work and to do her MBA there. I was like totally in awe when I heard her conversing in fluent Jap with one of Karen's Japanese friends.
Meifang's a journalist for an insurance magazine and Sharon's in her dad's business selling steel. Belinda is an event manager and the boss of her own little 2-man company. She does belly dancing too (how cool is that!) Karen's a yoga teacher. I just realised we did not ask Juli what she is doing now. Perhaps the rest already know?
Then we asked each other the typical question. "So, when's your turn?". My response, "not yet...no hurry at all and no neccessity. " Hers was "God hasn't provided me with one yet". Hmmm... okie.... Meifang isn't married either and she doesn't intend to yet (not sure why though, I did not probe). Sharon gave a firm shake of her head when asked too.
So there you have it. A handful of 31-year olds all with very different careers and all leading their own lives the way they want to (or at least, I think so). We're so diversed in our paths and we've gone all over the world (we talked about where so-and-so was now, in which country, married to husband from where, etc etc).
Some of my friends have gotten married to Caucasians more than 15 years their senior. In fact, I think Karen's husband (as I heard from the gals) is in his mid-40s. He's Canadian, by the way.
It's amazing how Mrs Yu can talk about her condition in such a candid manner. She talks about it like she just had a small cut on her finger. She can still laugh and joke with us. Her husband was with her at the reception too.
We even bitched about Ms K!! Now that we're all grown up, Mrs Yu let us in a little on how she also disliked Ms K. I related my experience of being rejected by Ms K when I applied to go back to teach at MG back in 1998. Her snorty replies put me off so much that I kind of made my mind not to go back there.
It was really really heartwarming to meet up with them again. Maybe I'm sentimental but its like we have this sisterhood bond that I could almost feel when we worked to put the lunch reception together with the caterer. We've exchanged contacts and said we'd meet up again. Lulu's flying back to Japan this Wednesday.
Oh man, I'm inspired to learn Japanese. It seems easy enough! She picked it up in 2 years without classes. She just picked it all up off the streets. Cool huh?
Being with friends from other walks of life also made me realise i'm so un-globalised (can't find the right word.) I mean, I'm so trapped in the little school in the West, entwined into the little micro-happenings going around the school, when on the larger scale, people my age are seeing the world, travelling, learning new languages, experiencing independent living overseas, discussing the price difference of LV in Japan and in Paris.(!)
I feel like a kampong girl.
I need to give myself time and space. Do I really see myself staying as a teacher in a tiny neighbourhood school for the next 30 years? For all the nobel nature of the job and the many lives that I can touch as the students pass under my hands, are there greater and more exciting things that are in store that I can explore? Do I dare to take that leap?
The thinking has begun.
It was like a mini MG-reunion at her wedding! I met old friends Sharon, Lulu, Meifang, Belinda and Juli. we were all from different classes. Belinda, Sharon, Meifang, Juli and Karen were from Arts1. Lulu was from Arts2 and I was from Science2. Despite that, we all recognized each other and the moment we met, we were like "Oh my God, (name)!!!!" Lulu and I wre trying the recall the last time we saw each other. We both realised (to our disbelief) that its been Fifteen years!! Wow....we haven changed abit. :-)
And even Mrs Moses Yu attended the wedding! We were so happy to see Mrs Yu. Mrs Yu never taught me at MG but somehow, the community was so small back then and everyone knew everyone, ever girl knew every teacher too. Mrs Yu was the form teacher of Arts1. She taught my sister and I think she even taught my mum! She's still bright and cheery. Over lunch, you can see all of us girls fussing over her, helping her get her food, eating with her, chatting and etc. No we were not boot-licking or whatever....Mrs Yu has luekemia and she walks with a stick really slowly. So were were just doing what we've been taught at school.
To master, to grow and to serve. (MGS Motto)
It was really fun meeting up with old friends. We may not have been really close back then, but somehow the connection is still there when we sit and talk about the good ol' days.
Lulu can speak fluent Japanese! She's working in Tokyo now and she has been out of Singapore for the past 11 years. She first went to the States to study after her A levels at Nanyang JC. Then she worked in LA and in San Francisco. Then she quit her job and went to Japan to work and to do her MBA there. I was like totally in awe when I heard her conversing in fluent Jap with one of Karen's Japanese friends.
Meifang's a journalist for an insurance magazine and Sharon's in her dad's business selling steel. Belinda is an event manager and the boss of her own little 2-man company. She does belly dancing too (how cool is that!) Karen's a yoga teacher. I just realised we did not ask Juli what she is doing now. Perhaps the rest already know?
Then we asked each other the typical question. "So, when's your turn?". My response, "not yet...no hurry at all and no neccessity. " Hers was "God hasn't provided me with one yet". Hmmm... okie.... Meifang isn't married either and she doesn't intend to yet (not sure why though, I did not probe). Sharon gave a firm shake of her head when asked too.
So there you have it. A handful of 31-year olds all with very different careers and all leading their own lives the way they want to (or at least, I think so). We're so diversed in our paths and we've gone all over the world (we talked about where so-and-so was now, in which country, married to husband from where, etc etc).
Some of my friends have gotten married to Caucasians more than 15 years their senior. In fact, I think Karen's husband (as I heard from the gals) is in his mid-40s. He's Canadian, by the way.
It's amazing how Mrs Yu can talk about her condition in such a candid manner. She talks about it like she just had a small cut on her finger. She can still laugh and joke with us. Her husband was with her at the reception too.
We even bitched about Ms K!! Now that we're all grown up, Mrs Yu let us in a little on how she also disliked Ms K. I related my experience of being rejected by Ms K when I applied to go back to teach at MG back in 1998. Her snorty replies put me off so much that I kind of made my mind not to go back there.
It was really really heartwarming to meet up with them again. Maybe I'm sentimental but its like we have this sisterhood bond that I could almost feel when we worked to put the lunch reception together with the caterer. We've exchanged contacts and said we'd meet up again. Lulu's flying back to Japan this Wednesday.
Oh man, I'm inspired to learn Japanese. It seems easy enough! She picked it up in 2 years without classes. She just picked it all up off the streets. Cool huh?
Being with friends from other walks of life also made me realise i'm so un-globalised (can't find the right word.) I mean, I'm so trapped in the little school in the West, entwined into the little micro-happenings going around the school, when on the larger scale, people my age are seeing the world, travelling, learning new languages, experiencing independent living overseas, discussing the price difference of LV in Japan and in Paris.(!)
I feel like a kampong girl.
I need to give myself time and space. Do I really see myself staying as a teacher in a tiny neighbourhood school for the next 30 years? For all the nobel nature of the job and the many lives that I can touch as the students pass under my hands, are there greater and more exciting things that are in store that I can explore? Do I dare to take that leap?
The thinking has begun.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Love me the way I want to be loved.
The Five Love Languages
Your primary love language is probably
Physical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.
Complete set of results
Physical Touch : 11
Quality Time : 7
Words of Affirmation : 5
Acts of Service : 4
Receiving Gifts : 3
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others. Dr. Chapman's love languages are: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.
Take the test
This was the test I took sometime in March, which left me in tears in front of the computer because I felt so alone in our relationship at that time.
It's the people around you. You've got yourself a new job and you're one of the oldest guys around at the office and everyone else is mostly still in their early 20's, single, confused (perhaps), still out to impress the world, out to tell the world who they think they are.
No one there talks about getting married. But everyone else at home does. Even you tell yourself that you need to tie the knot soon.
You've put yourself under so much pressure and you did not share it with me. We've always been able to talk about anything at all, haven't we? I guess we drifted apart so it made it hard to share. You thought I was super keen on getting hitched. I was wondering why the hell you're pushing for it to be so soon. Though inside me, I was happy that I had gotten a rare catch of the male species...one that actually wants to settle down. But on the whole, I wasn't exactly keen yet and was actually afraid that you were going to pop the question soon.
So now everything is hey-ok between us. We've got it all sorted out (well, kind of) and we're both ok about things. I could say that we're back on track. And that's good.
I've got quite abit of things to adapt to, with the changes that are happening around us.
I'm not totally comfortable with the fact that you see beautiful people everyday at work. Pretty girls with slender bodies that are proportionate in every way. It makes me insecure but it's not something that I can do anything about. Perhaps if would work if you stop trying to tell me what's trendy these days like I'm some middle-aged woman from the west who dresses so badly. I mean, its ok to tell me what's the latest stuff but leave it to me to decide if I want to pick them up. Already it doesn't help that i'm not tall, slim and pretty.
Yeah, these are my insecurities. I've got to live with them. I know. But it's just not so helpful that I don't feel appreciated for the things that I feel confident about, or for whatever effort I try to put in.
Man....so much more to say but I'm really sleepy now. Have a wedding tomorrow morning.
Your primary love language is probably
Physical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.
Complete set of results
Physical Touch : 11
Quality Time : 7
Words of Affirmation : 5
Acts of Service : 4
Receiving Gifts : 3
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others. Dr. Chapman's love languages are: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.
Take the test
This was the test I took sometime in March, which left me in tears in front of the computer because I felt so alone in our relationship at that time.
It's the people around you. You've got yourself a new job and you're one of the oldest guys around at the office and everyone else is mostly still in their early 20's, single, confused (perhaps), still out to impress the world, out to tell the world who they think they are.
No one there talks about getting married. But everyone else at home does. Even you tell yourself that you need to tie the knot soon.
You've put yourself under so much pressure and you did not share it with me. We've always been able to talk about anything at all, haven't we? I guess we drifted apart so it made it hard to share. You thought I was super keen on getting hitched. I was wondering why the hell you're pushing for it to be so soon. Though inside me, I was happy that I had gotten a rare catch of the male species...one that actually wants to settle down. But on the whole, I wasn't exactly keen yet and was actually afraid that you were going to pop the question soon.
So now everything is hey-ok between us. We've got it all sorted out (well, kind of) and we're both ok about things. I could say that we're back on track. And that's good.
I've got quite abit of things to adapt to, with the changes that are happening around us.
I'm not totally comfortable with the fact that you see beautiful people everyday at work. Pretty girls with slender bodies that are proportionate in every way. It makes me insecure but it's not something that I can do anything about. Perhaps if would work if you stop trying to tell me what's trendy these days like I'm some middle-aged woman from the west who dresses so badly. I mean, its ok to tell me what's the latest stuff but leave it to me to decide if I want to pick them up. Already it doesn't help that i'm not tall, slim and pretty.
Yeah, these are my insecurities. I've got to live with them. I know. But it's just not so helpful that I don't feel appreciated for the things that I feel confident about, or for whatever effort I try to put in.
Man....so much more to say but I'm really sleepy now. Have a wedding tomorrow morning.
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