Today's SMC meeting was at this NTU Alumni clubhouse place.. after lunch, we had our meeting at the karaoke room (Long sofas so everyone could rest their butts). It was pretty claustrophobic because everyone was seated butt-to-butt. Eventually, we were ushered to sit at the open Karaoke area because they had not opened for business yet and we had the entire place to ourselves.
The meeting ended at around 6:30pm. By then, I was already frantically on the phone with A as she was in school with the band. The band is very stressed up about the competition tomorrow. I am stressed too. So worried for them. I know they will do well but the current statistics of the awards given out so far are not too promising. Rumour has it that they've raised the standards this year and more than 50% of the bands who've had the judging so far actually got a bronze. Even top bands last year. Its very stressful information to digest.
Not to mention, the kids were not exactly concentrating during their only precious hour this noon (from 5pm to 6pm) and KC had to blast at them for not being focussed. I spoke to D later in the evening and she told me that almost everyone cried (the girls, that is) after they were dismissed this evening. Everyone was so stressed. They all want to do well but the pressure is just too great. B was unhappy that he was singled out for a scolding by KC as he had not been playing well. Heard from D that he was angry too. The leaders stayed back in the band room with the Sec 5s and they had a talk about it all. B was angry and upset that the band now felt it was all his fault for the sudden cancellation of practice. J tried to tell him that he needed to buck up as "it's SYF leh..." but I think he was probably too angry to listen.
Sigh... Poor kids. The pressure is just too much. I'll have to speak to them tomorrow after flag-raising... before they get out of class to go prepare for the competition. Need to encourage them and boost their morale a little. Now's the time to try to manage how they feel. The anxiety and emotions are on a high in every aspect. I can almost choke!
This band has come so so far.... when I listen to them, when I compare how they were previously to how they are now, I must say that they have been improving. Secretly, I had hoped that they would bring home a Gold award this time round. They deserve it. They're improved since the last competition. And if we got a Silver the last time, it should be natural to look towards the Gold isn't it? But judging from the statistics of the results from the past three days of competition so far.... SIGH... we'll really have alot of damage control and managing of expectations and emotions to do.
I can feel my heart in my throat. When I listen to their music, I am almost moved to tears (I fight them back). When I think about all that we've gone through together, all the effort they've put in, the practices they've had, the scoldings, the encouragement they've given to each other, the laughter shared, the sectionals where they really practice hard, over and over again... I just feel so moved. So much so that I can almost cry. My heart swells with pride when I listen to them. I am so proud of the band members. So very proud.
Tomorrow, they will be on stage as we recieve our results. We're the last band to go for tomorrow. I pray that they judges will not be too tired. I pray that our music will make them sit up straight and listen to us more attentively because we're making a difference. I pray that my students will give their best and really enjoy the performance on stage. May tomorrow's performance, albeit the short 10 minutes that they have, be the absolute BEST of all the times they've played those 2 pieces back to back.
SYF 2007, here we come!
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