This blog was written in the early hours of 2 April 2003. I had problems posting it as it was (as stated) “too long”. Anyway, have decided to break it into 2 parts then….
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Leslie Cheung committed suicide on 1 April. He fell 26 storeys to his death.

I was shocked when I found out. Right now, I am listening to his songs. I have a collection of CDs and MP3s and I'm just listening to them. Did a search on the web just now to try to find out more about his death. I keyed in "leslie cheung suicide" and I got a result of a list of the movies that he did and I realised that he actually acted in many many movies that dealt with suicide in them. He himself acted in a few films where the character he played killed himself over love. "Farewell to My Concubine" and "Rouge" to name a few.

I like his slow songs. As I listen to them now, the lyrics are so sad. Together with the tune and his voice, I was so overwhelmed that tears welled in my eyes. It sounds crazy and I know I always laugh at teeny-bopper gals who cry when they see their idols and all that. I cannot explain why I feel so sad. Maybe Leslie is a character that has accompanied me eversince I was 10. I have seen and loved so many of his films (I caught "Farewell To My Concubine" twice in the cinema and many more times at home - I bought the VCD) and I only started to listen to his songs when I was in NUS. And I only like the slow ballads.

I wonder what went on in his mind when he decided to kill himself. What was it that troubled him so much that he wanted to take his life?