Its slightly pass midnight now. I recieved quite a few messages on my handphone from my friends. Even got some messages on icq too. But the person I really wished to hear it from has not messaged or said "Happy Birthday" yet, even as we spoke over the phone just awhile ago. My phone's quiet now. There are no friends online on icq. I tell myself that I am blessed ....so many people messaged me already. I even got an email from Theresa.

But I can't help but wonder why. It's something so simple. And it's almost childish to be feeling this way now. I know. But I still feel this bit of disappointment. Not too much. Just a bit. I try to think of reasons. Maybe today has been kept at such a low profile between us that it seems to be just another day that passes, that goes unnoticed. Maybe its forgetfulness (but I did mention that I want to go for a special dinner with you to pamper myself since I have my bonus this month and all that....I thought that might kind of "remind" you?) Maybe you have bigger plans or surprises for me tomorrow? Why do I bother myself to think so much? I am so paranoid. I'm just disappointed.

I sensed a barrier just now. Please tell me I imagined it. I sense the barrier since this evening. I don't know why. Maybe you're stressed by the computer. Maybe you're not too sure how to feel after having written that email. Maybe you're not sure of what my reaction is to your email. Maybe you're a little on the apprehensive mood. Maybe you were trying to sense how I feel before you can relax. I'm not upset by the email, nor by the issue. Not at all, ok dear?

Oh what the heck. Why feel disappointed? I should count my blessings instead....